‘Where I’m supposed to be’
Published 1:15 am Wednesday, August 20, 2014
- A.J. Lamar coaches up his West Point Warriors in 2010, his sophomore season atop the Class 5A football program.
To put it in football terms, A.J. Lamar fumbled life’s pigskin.
On the 1-yard line.
In the final seconds.
To lose the national championship.
But this isn’t a story about football. Rather, it’s a cautionary and, hopefully, inspirational tale about a man who made a massive mistake, got right with God, turned his life around and is now receiving a second chance.
Lamar spoke out for the first time Tuesday since stepping down as West Point’s head football coach following his June 2013 arrest for public intoxication. Fourteen months later, the lifetime athlete has returned to the Warriors, in a different role and sporting an entirely new persona.
Just weeks before the start of the 2014 campaign, Lamar was fittingly installed as the program’s running backs coach. If there’s one thing the former Cullman and University of North Alabama standout knows best, it’s how to run the football.
Oh, and struggles, too.
Lamar has faced plenty in the 14 months since his humiliating incident, not to mention the several years that led up to it.
Dating all the way back to his baseball days as a 5-year-old, Lamar cannot remember having a losing season in anything he played. The three-sport star was an All-American at Cullman, the fullback for a UNA squad that reeled in three straight national titles from 1993-95, and even managed to pull off modest 6-5 and 5-5 records in his first head coaching gig at Vinemont.
Buzz and excitement followed Lamar to West Point in 2009, but his knack for success did not. The Warriors went 2-8 his first fall on campus, and he absolutely couldn’t stand it.
Football was no longer what he did but who he was, creating an obsession and void of happiness that could only be filled by wins. They ultimately never came, at least not in the droves Lamar was used to, as West Point went a combined 10-20 his next three years.
When nothing else produced the results Lamar sought, he turned to alcohol. The substance caught up with him in the wee hours of June 20, 2013, when he was arrested at a service station and subsequently charged with public intoxication.
Lamar was placed on administrative leave and eventually resigned from his head coaching post but stayed on with the Warriors as a physical education instructor.
On Tuesday, Lamar referred to the episode as “embarrassing,” not only for himself, but his family, his school and “everybody that’s been in contact with his life.” He was also proud to reveal he hasn’t had a drink since the night of his arrest.
He doesn’t plan to ever again, either.
“When I turned to alcohol and let football be my idol, I let that be the thing I was worshipping,” Lamar said. “I’m not saying having a drink’s going to send you to hell. I’m just saying that alcohol will take you deeper and deeper than you ever want to go. It will cause hardship. It will cause strains on your marriage, on your family, and that’s what I let it do.
“There’s nothing wrong with people who go out and do whatever they do, but I let it go too far. I’m just very thankful that I’m here to share this story and that I didn’t end up dead, that my wife still has a husband and that my kids still have a daddy.”
Before Lamar’s focus could return to his career, he had to undergo a much-needed lifestyle change and set his priorities straight. Past “playmates and playgrounds,” the people and places he once associated with, were among the first to go. The next step was developing a relationship with God, something Lamar had self-admittedly never done.
As a child, Lamar didn’t grow up in a religious setting and doesn’t remember going to church until the seventh or eighth grade (“That was not our thing.”). He said he’s always believed in God but never really had faith to hand over his will and life to a higher power.
Until now.
These days, Lamar starts his days by praying, meditating and reading the Bible. He’s also big on grasping motivation from faith-based quotes like: “From skin in belongs to you. From skin out belongs to God. You can’t control anything outside of you.”
“I’m in a great place for me,” Lamar said. “In my lifetime, I’ve been blessed with way more than I’ve probably deserved. But I’ve never had a peace or presence like I do now, and it’s ultimately because I’ve got God running my life.”
Some of those blessings were actually curses, though. Just because he was an exceptional athlete, there were times Lamar received free passes in sticky situations when he probably shouldn’t have.
But that’s bound to happen in a society that places a great deal of pressure on kids who play sports and an even higher emphasis on the ones who excel at them.
“I’m 39, and I’m hoping I live to be 90. I’ve still got over 50 percent of my life to live, and I quit playing football when I was 22,” Lamar said. “There’s a lot more to life than just hitting a ball, throwing a ball and playing football — and I lost all that.”
During his last two seasons with West Point, Lamar also lost sight of the real reason he started coaching high school sports in the first place — to make a difference in the lives of student-athletes. He feels more prepared to do so now than ever and hopes the Warriors’ upperclassmen, many of whom he head coached not so long ago, will take notice of his newfound positive attitude.
Lamar is well aware it will take actions, not words, however, to prove to the players his old antics won’t resurface under the heat of the Friday night lights.
“I know they’re out there thinking, ‘Gosh, is coach Lamar ever going to snap on me again? Is he going to go off?’” he said. “And I don’t think so because my priorities are different. It’s supposed to be fun and enjoyable.”
Lamar’s return to the gridiron raises one obvious question: Do his long-term plans include another foray into head coaching?
Just don’t ask the man himself, because he doesn’t feel that’s a query he can currently answer.
Lamar is leaving that up to Him.
“I think I’ve done everything A.J. Lamar wanted to do. I haven’t done what God really called me to do,” he said. “I don’t know if he’s going to call me to be a head coach. I don’t know if he’s going to call me to do something totally different. I’m not looking at the future, because if you truly have faith in God, he’s got the best plan for you. He knows what I can handle and what I can’t.
“Right now, I’m where I’m supposed to be — the running backs coach for the West Point Warriors. This is what I’m supposed to be doing. I truly believe that.”